Long ago I decided that life would be much simpler if I could just have someone hook me up to an IV of caffeine—I wouldn’t have to slow down to sip. In my pre-op screening, the anesthesiologist asked me about my caffeine consumption. I explained my ‘caffeine layering’ technique: chai in the morning (2-4 cups); ‘energy water’ midmorning; coffee in the afternoon (pro re nata); the occasional espresso in the evening; caffeinated mints throughout. He asked me if I get headaches when I don’t consume. Well, yeah. So he ordered 500 cc of caffeine to be added to my IV. Nice man. My hero.
I thought he was kidding, but soon the nurse came with a little bitty vial of the good stuff. She checked the order, then asked me hold on. I overheard the conversation:
NURSE
500 cc? Is that right?
OTHER NURSE
Yes. That’s what he wrote.
NURSE
Okay. I just wanted to check [pause] because [pause, then whispered] she’s so small.
OTHER NURSE
Yeah. 500 cc. That’s the order. That’s what he wrote. I can check with him again . . .
NURSE
No, no. That’s what he wrote. Okay. Just like to double check.
[end dialogue]
I have such appreciation for modern medicine.
1 comment:
Wow! You impressed the nurses!!
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